Here are a couple of shots I took recently of Michael showing off his bike and ball tricks.

Saw this at Lifeway.com. It comes from their regular email newsletter called “Let’s Worship” that corresponds with the Magazine of the same name.

“For some people, church growth can be rather tedious. There’s the parking problems, the new people to get to know, the reduction of political power due to the influx of new people that don’t know you, the extra wear on the carpet, the noise of young children, the overuse of bathroom facilities . . . you name it. So as we contemplate growth, I thought I’d share a few ideas that could very well solve the spread of people throughout the foyer of your church’s worship center. Pick a couple and see what happens.

1. Begin your message with the phrase, “You know what’s wrong with you people…”
2. Place the Student Sunday School space near the “Ruth class” for ladies 70 and above.
3. Move business meetings to Sunday morning and open up the floor by asking, “So does anybody have a beef?”
4. Begin that year-long sermon series on the 40 weeks of Daniel.
5. Place a polygraph machine on the front pew to be used during the invitation time.
6. Place tire puncture strips in the parking lot for cars going the wrong way before Sunday School.
7. Pick a NASCAR driver as your favorite and complain about all the other drivers (this works best in Alabama).
8. Place the roller coaster “You must be this tall” sign at the entrance of the worship center. (And make it stand about 5′ 8 1/2″)
9. Keep the Christmas pageant livestock in the church choir room year round.
10. Announce that on high attendance Sunday, if the goal is met, everyone will kiss the pig!
11. If your auditorium slopes downward to the platform give every kid under 12 a handful of marbles before the service.
12. Give deacons the ability to “gong” the special music. 
13. Place the outdoor welcome center tent a few feet from the septic tank.
14. Replace the pictures of former pastors with pictures of Larry, Moe, and Curly.
15. Start arranging marriages in the singles department.
16. Put a blank for “weight” on the membership information forms.
17. Invite the “cops” crew along during hospital visits.
18. Demand mandatory drug tests for all senior adult excursions.
19. In order to feel relevant, say “Dude” 15 times from the pulpit each Sunday.
20. Have the organist play hockey cheers at pivotal moments of the sermon.
21. Place armed guards in front of the Sunday School supply closet.
22. Before the offertory hymn have the worship leader scream, “Show me the money!”
23. Charge tolls for the use of restrooms.
24. Illustrate all sermons or Sunday School lessons with scenes from “Walker Texas Ranger.”
25. Use the “American Idol” format for staff hirings.”

This was pretty funny and would make a great intro for a sermon on evangelism or the church.

I was just minding my own business at the Southern Baptist Convention in Greensboro, NC last June, when suddenly a big, dark-haired man sitting next to me struck up a conversation. He told me about his venture out in Arizona and handed me a small, business-card-sized computer disk. I took it home and learned about his plans to start a church in the brand new community of Tartesso, Arizona. Little did I know that Dennis would become a prayer partner. His church is getting started and he is reaching the people in that new community for Christ. To learn more about his church check out his website. I hope you will pray for Dennis too.